Thursday Thirteen #62

Thirteen Things That Make My Kids Weird

1. While my son did spend his first five years in the city, he now prefers the forest and sees that the city is overrun by advertising, excessive consumption, and garbage. He breathes a sigh of relief when we return to Creekistan.

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2. Both my children love expensive cheese, especially brie. Occasionally we'll splurge and buy a wedge or hunk of stinky French, Dutch, or Norwegian cheese, but we have to hide it. My daughter has been known to plunge her hand into a tub of Feta and eat a handful.

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3. Both my kids love the music group They Might Be Giants . It might be because I listed to them while I was in labor. Their funny and singable songs helped take my mind off of the pain.

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4. My daughter is a "princess," with long flowing blond hair, but she really loves superheros. She can correctly identify Batman, Robin, Superman, and Spider-man. Oh, and Austin Powers.

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5. Both my kids have great Evil Laughs and we practice laughing maniacally on a regular basis.

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6. If my daughter thinks things are getting out of hand, she'll yell, "Expelliarmus," really loud. (That's the Harry Potter spell for disarming.)

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7. We recently heard a promo on our XM satellite radio for a funny morning show. It goes like this: [Operator] "City and state please?" [Funny guy] "Blakameekmen" [Operator] "Can you spell that?" [Funny guy] "T-H-A-T" We thought that was so funny that we all just blurt out "Blakameekmen" every so often. Even my 2 1/2 year old daughter. It makes me laugh every time.

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8. We sit down to dinner just about every night. Nowadays, as sad as it might sound, it probably qualifies as weird.

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9. My daughter loves capers. You know, those small pea-sized things you sometimes see on gourmet shows. Last night I put a few capers on top of the pasta I made. Before we could all sit down to eat, she had picked out and eaten most of them. (FYI: Capers are the immature buds plucked from a small bush native to the Middle East and Mediterranean regions of the world. Fresh caper blossoms are not especially flavorful, but their sharpness increases dramatically after sun-drying and brining in vinegar.) I had to call it "The Caper Caper."

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10. Both my kids love sushi. No, sushi does not necessarily mean raw fish. They prefer the vegetarian variety. But my daughter is developing a taste for fish.

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11. My kids understand that music can be any interesting sound, and will experiment to see what sound certain objects make. We've been known to play an entire percussion symphony with only what's on the dinner table.

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12. My kids have hung around semi-famous artists and take it for granted. About four years ago, my son tested objects that were going to be featured in the children's section at the opening of the new Contemporary Arts Center in Cincinnati. We went to the artist's studio and tried them out. He now has a "been there, done that" attitude.

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13. My daughter likes coffee. I have to keep it out of her reach. When I go to Starbucks (thank God there's a Starbucks near Creekistan now!) I have to get them to make a little extra and put it in a small sample cup for her. Don't worry, I don't do this often and it's usually in the morning. I tell her that she can't start drinking coffee until she turns 3. That's when I started drinking coffee.

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