Thursday Thirteen #32

13 Things That I Want Everyone To Know

1. A rabid bat can bite you while you’re sleeping and you wouldn’t know until you die of rabies.



2. Accidentally putting metal in a microwave will not destroy the microwave. In the late ‘70s, I accidentally put a stick of margarine in the microwave, not thinking that the outside covering was foil. The light show was spectacular! As far as I know, that microwave is still running.



3. Curses or blessings cannot be passed through e-mail. How many times have you received an e-mail that says “pass this on to 5 people or you will . . . ?” I am not afraid of ignoring those sort-of things.



4. Elmo is voiced by Kevin Clash, a 46 year-old African American man. It always makes me feel good to know that there are some adults, just like me, who haven’t lost touch with their inner 4-year-old.



5. Gilbert Gottfried actually does the voice of the AFLAC duck.



6. Halloween does not have anything to do with Satan. Some people believe that Halloween is a prime recruiting season for Satanists and therefore poses a considerable chance for children to convert. If you look at it simply, it is a secular holiday where children dress in costumes and go door-to-door trick and treating for candy. I have never experienced a Satanist prostletizing Satanism. In fact, I have experienced the opposite: Christians prostletizing Christianity.



7. In the song, “Blinded By the Light,” by Manfred Mann (1976), the lyric that sounds like, “Wrapped up like a douche, you know the roamer in the night,” is actually “revved up like a deuce, Another runner in the night.” A “deuce” is a 1932 Ford Coupe, as in “Little Deuce Coupe.” Now you know.



8. Jell-O is not a salad. Sorry Mom! It’s a dessert.



9. Jesus was not born on December 25th. Starting about the eighth century, Christians began to discourage pagan or secular celebrations and to make up a Christian meaning for the celebration. The most common times for celebration are the Winter Solstice and the Spring Equinox. Christians then assimilated those celebrations into Christmas and Easter.



10. Podcasts do not require an iPod in order to listen to them.



11. Sushi does not mean “raw fish.” I don’t like fish. But I will eat sushi. That’s because I like sushi that does not include fish. Sushi is a type of food that has seaweed, rice, and an inside. While that inside is usually fish, it can be all kinds of other things. I love Inari: sushi rice filled into deep fried tofu bags.



12. When a kid says they are feeing sick, as in “going to throw up,” believe them and immediately act accordingly. As a child that was prone to car sickness, I can attest.



13. You do not need to stop when making a right turn. Unless there is a stop sign.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    

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